Jumping Off The Cliff

"You can't cross the sea merely by standing and staring at the water." — Rabindranath Tagore

Steve Jobs once said that you can only connect the dots looking backward. During my journaling session this week, I found myself reflecting on the gap between where I am now and where I want to be. I don’t want to wait another 5 or 10 years to make a leap—not even a major one. I want to start crawling today, standing tomorrow, walking the next day, and by the end of the week, be ready to run.

So, I decided to revisit my past to uncover the common threads in my life's milestones. What stood out to me was the power of taking risks. I realized that every time I saw a detour and chose to take it, I opened myself up to new possibilities. Even if I didn't know where the detour would lead, I knew it would be better than living the same life over and over.

One of the biggest risks I ever took was moving to Malaysia without knowing anyone. Well, almost no one—I had two countrymen there who were promoting studying in Malaysia, and through them, I made the leap. I arrived with just $2,000 in my pocket and a promise from my sister that she would help if needed. I had to learn to navigate an entirely new world, speak a different language, decode a new culture, and find myself in this unfamiliar, intimidating place.

As a Black woman traveling the world with limited English, I was scared, excited, and confused all at once. When I finally reached Kuala Lumpur and settled into my accommodation, I felt a profound sense of loss, as if my umbilical cord had just been cut. For the first time, I was far away from the protective roof of my parents, who had always taken care of me. I looked around and saw no one who looked like me. It was terrifying.

I came as a student, enrolling in an English school. Looking back, I realize that I always wanted to go on an English language trip, and it finally happened—not in Europe, the USA, or Australia, but in Malaysia.

When I arrived, all I heard was that foreigners couldn't find jobs in Malaysia. But when an opportunity presented itself, I took a leap of faith and applied. My English wasn't great, I was shy about speaking, and spending time with my countrymates wasn’t helping. Yet, I took the risk. The job included night shifts, and despite my fear of navigating Kuala Lumpur at night, I went for it. That decision changed the course of my life.

Traveling the world alone, I took risks—journeys to Dubai, Australia, and Morocco, venturing into unknown territories by myself. Every time I took a risk, it paid off, becoming a transformative experience. And yet, here I am, stuck in the same spot, within a comfort zone that no longer feels comfortable.

Whenever I made these big leaps, I had courage, focus, and relentless determination to pursue happiness. That's what I need right now. I plan to journal more about this and see where it leads me. But one thing is certain: I’m not waiting another 5 or 10 years to make a big leap. I will do whatever it takes to reach my destination—Freedom.

An excerpt of my untitled autobiography book.