I Belong Here....

"In the dance of life, never let the shadows define your steps; you are the choreographer of your worth, and your authenticity is the music that sets you free."

Countless times, I found myself diminishing my worth, squeezing into someone else's mold, convinced that they were superior to me in every aspect. It sounds absurd now, but that was my reality. Whether it was my English accent, the sound of my voice, my skin colour, or even my passport, I constantly felt inadequate, creating narratives in my mind that belittled me. Little did I realize, I was the storyteller, weaving tales of my own insufficiency.

I couldn't fathom why I harboured feelings of smallness and inadequacy, feeling unfit for certain rooms and spaces. I perceived some people as inherently better, almost divinely chosen to shine brightly in this world, while I struggled in their shadows. Then, one day, fed up with self-deprecation, I decided to live life with my head held high.

Unfortunately, the story doesn't end there. Those self-deprecating thoughts and the behaviours they triggered didn't vanish easily. A lifetime of negative reinforcement had allowed them to take root, growing into a formidable forest from a single seed.

Curious about the origin of these thoughts, I traced them back to a time when my dad fell ill, and my friends embarked on overseas studies. Unable to join them due to a lack of finances, I planted seeds of shame and unworthiness. During holidays, they'd returned transformed, adorned in knowledge, speaking a new language, and wearing beautiful clothes, it made me feel small and like a loser. I felt stagnant, surrounded by family members who only criticized and belittled me.

As I entertained these thoughts, their roots strengthened, influencing my actions. When faced with individuals I perceived as more accomplished, I mentally shrank. Cultivating self-awareness became a gradual process, aided by self-development books, audios, masterclasses, and courses. These tools allowed me to step back and see myself as a lion that had mistaken itself for a mere cat in the mirror.

Understanding that people treat you based on how you present yourself, I recognized that I was at fault. My human brand projected smallness and insignificance, inviting the world to respond accordingly.

The journey has been ongoing, with occasional struggles against old habits. I've learned to catch myself before reverting to freezing when entering certain rooms or underestimating myself in front of some people. Journaling, mantras, and listening to my personal manifesto have become my allies, reminding me daily to live bravely, to roar, soar, and be limitless.

For anyone grappling with self-worth issues, feeling inadequate or out of place, remember that God didn't seek anyone's permission when creating you and if you undervalue yourself, rest assured that the world will not raise the price.

As we navigate the intricate steps of self-discovery, let us remember that the symphony of our existence plays to the rhythm of our belief in self. We are not bound by the echoes of inadequacy; instead, we are liberated by the power of our own authenticity. In the grand ballet of life, stand tall, dance boldly, and let the world witness the masterpiece that is you. Embrace your worth, for in doing so, you grant others the permission to see your brilliance, and in that shared illumination, we collectively elevate the value of every soul. So, let your roar be heard, let your spirit soar, and may your journey be limitless, guided by the unwavering truth that you are inherently worthy.

With all my heart,

Salima

Book Recommendations:

The Magic Of Thinking Big by David J. Schwartz (Chapter 1, 2, 3)

The 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth by John C. Maxwell (Chapter 3)

Psycho-Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz