Self-Talk: A Primer

Even if you’ve never heard of self-talk, you’ve been doing it your whole life. It’s been around for a long time, probably since homo sapiens started talking. Here’s the short version: Self-talk is simply the words you say and think to yourself. It’s your inner voice, your internal dialogue. Sometimes it’s spoken, sometimes it’s silent. Sometimes you’re aware of it, usually you’re not… until you are.

Self-talk is essentially the dialogue you have about yourself, the way you think about yourself, and the things you do. Your self-talk is the way you perceive yourself and refer to yourself. Do you think you’re smart? Not smart? That’s your self-talk. Do you think you’re fortunate? Unfortunate? That’s your self-talk. Do you think opportunities are all around you? Or nowhere around you? That’s your self-talk. Do you think you’re gorgeous? Not gorgeous? Talented? Not talented? That's all-self-talk.

As you can see, self-talk can be good or bad, helpful, or dangerous. An affirmation, which is a statement that's said as though it's true, can be positive or negative. Everything we say or think about ourselves, and our lives becomes our truth as we affirm it—positively or negatively. That is, our subconscious believes it, whether it’s true or not.

The power of self-talk lies in its ability to shape our beliefs, attitudes, and behaviors. It can either empower us to reach our full potential or hold us back from achieving our goals. Negative self-talk can lead to self-doubt, low self-esteem, and a pessimistic outlook on life. On the other hand, positive self-talk can boost confidence, improve motivation, and foster resilience in the face of challenges.

To harness the power of self-talk for your personal growth and well-being, here are a few examples and exercises you can try:

Identify your self-talk patterns: Start by becoming aware of the thoughts and words you use when talking to yourself. Notice if your self-talk tends to be more positive or negative and identify any recurring themes or patterns. This awareness will help you understand the impact of your self-talk on your emotions and actions.

Challenge negative self-talk: Whenever you catch yourself engaging in negative self-talk, challenge those thoughts by questioning their validity. Ask yourself if there's evidence to support the negative belief or if there might be alternative explanations. Replace negative thoughts with more realistic and positive statements.

Example:

Negative self-talk: "I always mess things up. I'm such a failure."

Positive self-talk: "I've made mistakes in the past, but I can learn from them and do better next time."

Practice affirmations: Use positive affirmations to counteract negative self-talk and reinforce self-belief. Affirmations are statements that reflect the qualities, abilities, and outcomes you desire. Repeat them regularly, either silently or out loud, to reprogram your subconscious mind and cultivate a more positive mindset.

Example affirmations:

"I am capable of achieving great things."

"I deserve happiness and success."

"I am confident in my abilities."

Surround yourself with positivity: Pay attention to the influences in your environment, such as the people you spend time with, the books you read, or the media you consume. Surround yourself with positive and uplifting sources of inspiration and encouragement that reinforce empowering self-talk.

Practice self-compassion: Treat yourself with kindness and understanding, especially during challenging times. Offer yourself the same support and encouragement you would give to a friend. Remember that self-talk should be nurturing and compassionate rather than judgmental or harsh.

Visualize success: Use the power of visualization to enhance your self-talk. Imagine yourself achieving your goals and performing at your best. Visualize the positive outcomes you desire and let those images and thoughts fuel your motivation and determination.

Remember, self-talk is a habit that can be developed and improved over time. By consciously choosing positive and empowering self-talk, you can transform your mindset and create a more fulfilling and successful life. Start practicing these exercises and observe the positive changes they bring to your thoughts, emotions, and actions.

Yours Truly,

The Queen Of Africa